英文原文：My relationship with my PhD supervisor has become toxic — what do I do?

博士生求助信原文：

I am writing to ask for your advice because I am in crisis: I fear that my professional relationship with my supervisor has become toxic and irreparable. A huge problem for me is the complete lack of academic guidance. I feel that my research proposals are constantly being rejected. Worse, I often encounter extremely harsh remarks during this process. For example, my supervisor calls me “incompetent” and says I am “not even as good as a master’s student”. I receive no suggestions on how I should improve, which has caused my research attempts to hit a dead end repeatedly.

我寫信向你尋求建議，因為我正處于危機之中：我擔心我與導師的職業關系已經變得“有毒”且無法挽回。對我來說，最大的問題是完全缺乏學術指導。我的研究提案總是被否定，更糟的是，在這個過程中我還頻繁遭遇極其嚴厲的言語攻擊。比如，我的導師罵我“無能”，說我“甚至連碩士生都不如”。但我從來沒有得到過任何具體的改進建議，這導致我的研究一次次陷入死胡同。

The constant psychological pressure and verbal abuse have had a devastating impact on my mental health. I have been formally diagnosed with severe depression and mild anxiety. I am now at a crossroads: I do not know whether I should stay silent, file a complaint, or simply drop out of my PhD programme.

持續的心理壓力和言語虐待，已經對我的心理健康造成了毀滅性的打擊。我被正式確診為重度抑郁癥和輕度焦慮癥。現在我站在人生的十字路口：我不知道自己該選擇沉默、投訴，還是干脆退學。

I am desperate for advice on how to navigate this toxic relationship with my supervisor.

我迫切需要建議，來應對這段和導師之間的“有毒”關系。

Nature asked five experts in graduate education, mentorship and mental health for their advice on how to navigate this situation.

《Nature》邀請了5位來自研究生教育、導師指導和心理健康領域的專家，就如何應對這種情況提供建議。

1. Prioritize your mental health, always（1. 永遠優先考慮你的心理健康）

Your well-being must come first, before your PhD, says Charlotte Rogers, head of the graduate school at the University of Exeter, UK, and author of *How to Get Your PhD*. “A PhD is a chapter in your life, not your whole life,” she says. “If the relationship is making you unwell, that is the priority.”

英國埃克塞特大學研究生院院長、《如何獲得博士學位》一書的作者夏洛特·羅杰斯表示，你的健康必須放在首位，比博士學位更重要。“博士學位只是你人生中的一個篇章，不是你的全部人生，”她說。“如果這段關系讓你感到不適，那這就是首要需要解決的問題。”

The student should access their university’s counselling services immediately, Rogers says. Many institutions offer free, confidential support for students. They should also talk to trusted friends, family or peers, to break the isolation that often comes with toxic supervision.

羅杰斯說，這名學生應該立即利用學校的心理咨詢服務。許多機構都為學生提供免費、保密的支持。他還應該和信任的朋友、家人或同學交流，打破“有毒”指導通常帶來的孤立感。

“Stop blaming yourself,” Rogers adds. “The supervisor’s behaviour is their responsibility, not yours. Verbal abuse is never acceptable, no matter the context.”

“停止自責，”羅杰斯補充道。“導師的行為是他們的責任，不是你的。無論在何種情況下，言語虐待都是不可接受的。”

2. Gather evidence and assess the situation（2. 收集證據，評估情況）

英文原文：Before taking any formal action, the student should document everything, says Soo Hee Kim, a psychologist and director of the Office of Graduate Student Life at the University of California, San Francisco. “Keep a detailed record of all interactions with your supervisor: emails, meeting notes, instances of verbal abuse, and the impact on your work and mental health,” she says. “This evidence will be critical if you need to escalate the issue.”

加州大學舊金山分校心理學家、研究生生活辦公室主任金秀熙表示，在采取任何正式行動之前，學生應該記錄下所有事情。“詳細記錄你與導師的所有互動：郵件、會議紀要、言語虐待的具體事例，以及這些事情對你的工作和心理健康造成的影響，”她說。“如果你需要將問題升級，這些證據將至關重要。”

The student should also assess whether the toxic behaviour is targeted at them, or a pattern across the lab. “Talk to other students in the group, confidentially, to understand their experiences,” Kim says. “This will help you determine whether it is a systemic issue with the supervisor, or a personal conflict.”

學生還應該評估這種“有毒”行為是針對他個人，還是實驗室里的普遍現象。“私下和組里的其他學生交流，了解他們的經歷，”金秀熙說。“這將幫助你判斷，這是導師的系統性問題，還是你與導師之間的個人矛盾。”

3. Try to set boundaries and communicate clearly（3. 嘗試設定邊界，清晰溝通）

英文原文：If the relationship is not beyond repair, the student should attempt a structured, professional conversation with their supervisor, says Rogers. “Go into the meeting with a clear agenda: outline your research progress, the specific challenges you are facing, and what support you need to move forward,” she says. “Be specific, not emotional. For example: ‘I need clear, actionable feedback on my research proposal by X date, so that I can progress my work’.”

羅杰斯說，如果這段關系還沒有到無法挽回的地步，學生應該嘗試與導師進行一次有條理、專業的對話。“帶著清晰的議程參加會議：概述你的研究進度、你面臨的具體挑戰，以及你需要什么樣的支持才能繼續推進研究，”她說。“要具體，不要情緒化。比如：‘我需要在X日期前，得到關于我的研究提案的明確、可執行的反饋，這樣我才能推進我的工作’。”

The student should also set clear boundaries around acceptable behaviour, Kim says. “If the supervisor makes abusive remarks, calmly but firmly say: ‘I cannot continue this conversation if you speak to me in that way’,” she says. “This establishes that you will not tolerate mistreatment.”

金秀熙說，學生還應該為可接受的行為設定清晰的邊界。“如果導師發表侮辱性言論，要冷靜但堅定地說：‘如果你用這種方式和我說話，我就無法繼續這場對話了’，”她說。“這能明確表明，你不會容忍虐待行為。”

4. Seek support from your university（4. 向學校尋求支持）

英文原文：If direct communication fails, the student should turn to their university’s formal support structures, says Rogers. Most institutions have a graduate school, ombudsperson or student advocacy office that can help mediate conflicts, or support a request to change supervisors.

羅杰斯說，如果直接溝通失敗，學生應該向學校的正式支持機構求助。大多數機構都有研究生院、監察員或學生權益辦公室，這些部門可以幫助調解矛盾，或者為更換導師的請求提供支持。

“Changing supervisors is a legitimate right for PhD students, and many universities have clear processes in place for this,” Rogers says. “The student should submit their evidence to the relevant department, and request a formal review of their supervision.”

“更換導師是博士生的合法權利，許多大學都為此制定了明確的流程，”羅杰斯說。“學生應向相關部門提交證據，并請求對其指導情況進行正式審查。”

In China, many universities have introduced regulations to protect PhD students’ rights, including the right to apply for a change of supervisor, says Li Wei, a professor of higher education at Peking University, who studies graduate student mental health. “The student should familiarize themselves with their university’s policies, and follow the formal procedure to file a complaint or request a transfer,” he says.

北京大學高等教育學教授、研究研究生心理健康的李偉表示，在中國，許多大學已經出臺了保護博士生權利的規定，包括申請更換導師的權利。“學生應熟悉所在大學的政策，并按照正式程序提交投訴或申請轉學（轉導師），”他說。

5. Consider leaving the programme, if necessary（5. 必要時，考慮退出項目）

If the situation cannot be resolved, the student should not hesitate to consider leaving the PhD programme, says Kim. “Staying in a toxic environment will only cause further harm to your mental health, and can have long-term consequences for your career and well-being,” she says.

金秀熙說，如果問題無法解決，學生應該毫不猶豫地考慮退出博士項目。“留在‘有毒’的環境中只會進一步損害你的心理健康，并可能對你的職業發展和身心健康造成長期影響，”她說。

Leaving a PhD is not a failure, Rogers emphasizes. “It takes courage to recognize that a situation is not working, and to walk away,” she says. “There are many paths to a successful career, and a PhD is not the only one.”

羅杰斯強調，退出博士項目并不是失敗。“意識到一種情況行不通并選擇離開，這需要勇氣，”她說。“成功的職業道路有很多條，博士學位并不是唯一的一條。”

For students who wish to continue their research, transferring to another university or lab is an option, but it requires careful planning, says Li. “The student should reach out to potential new supervisors, explain their situation, and seek support to transfer their research,” he says.

李偉說，對于希望繼續從事研究的學生來說，轉學到另一所大學或實驗室是一個選擇，但這需要周密的計劃。“學生應聯系潛在的新導師，說明自己的情況，并尋求支持以轉移自己的研究項目，”他說。

Final thoughts（總結思考）

Toxic supervision is a systemic issue that requires action from universities, not just individual students, the experts say. Institutions must implement mandatory mentorship training for supervisors, regular check-ins for PhD students, and clear, accessible processes for reporting and resolving conflicts.

專家們表示，“有毒”指導是一個系統性問題，需要大學采取行動，而不僅僅是依靠學生個人。各機構必須為導師提供強制性的指導培訓，定期與博士生溝通，并建立清晰、易操作的投訴和沖突解決流程。

But for students in crisis, the priority is clear: protect your mental health, seek support, and know that you do not have to tolerate abuse.

但對于處于危機中的學生來說，優先級很明確：保護好自己的心理健康，尋求支持，并記住——你不必容忍任何虐待行為。